Do you often feel like you’re not doing enough, not working hard enough, not achieving enough? Despite your accomplishments, do you have an intense fear of being “canceled” or getting “called out”? If you nodded in response, welcome to the Collective Imposter Allegiance! (did someone say CIA?)
The umbrella term for these fears is called imposter syndrome. And it is not at all a new phenomenon. Back in 1978, Psychologists Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes coined imposter syndrome as the belief that your successes were only due to luck. And not because of your effort, talents, or qualifications.
However, with ever-increasing pressure and standards, imposter syndrome today applies to anyone who isn’t able to internalize their own successes. A review article presented in the International Journal of Behavioral Science estimated a whopping 70% of people experiencing imposter feelings at some point in their lives.
My experience with imposter syndrome
Just like you, I used to be crippled by feelings of incompetence and unworthiness. Praise and compliments made me feel uncomfortable instead of proud. At times, I assume people were just trying to be nice. Other times I believed that any achievement was due to luck. I feared that I wouldn’t be able to replicate it. I also was also petrified that any competence I exude will one day be exposed as a charade.
However, upon all the anxiety attacks and insomniatic nights, I’ve gotten weary. The more I try to swim against the current, the more exhausted I got. One day, I surrendered. To my surprise, several truths behind my imposter syndrome rose to the surface.
Four truths behind imposter syndrome
Upon reflection, I’ve started to see the truths within these feelings of fraudulence. Rather than removing these fears, I’m learning to use them to bring me more clarity and guidance.
1) It highlights how childhood beliefs become reinforced by adulthood demands
Oftentimes, childhood experiences, such as feeling like our peers or siblings outshone us in certain areas, imprint a lasting impact. I definitely internalized these beliefs as an impressionable child. That to be loved, I needed to achieve. Furthermore, as we grow up to be more educated and skilled, we also become warier of how much we don’t know. We get better at detecting our flaws on a microscopic level, further reinforcing these childhood beliefs.
These experiences are basically the perfect recipe for imposter syndrome. Without awareness, we continue to indulge in a self-perpetuating cycle of perfectionism and disappointment. However, by simply asking ourselves “why?”, we can address the true reason behind this constant self-dissatisfaction.
2) It acts as a guide to what really matters
Ironically, the areas in your life where you feel the most imposter syndrome are actually the areas you hope to find the most value. These feelings highlight what you’re willing to fight for, what you’re willing to commit to. Albeit it’s not in the most pleasant way, your imposter syndrome can actually bring you some clarity.
Think about it. If you’re an artist, you wouldn’t mind being an unskilled athlete. But you’d worry if you’re competent enough in your craft. Similarly, if you’re a businessperson, you wouldn’t compare yourself to a scientist. Ultimately, you feel like an imposter because you want to excel in areas you want to make a difference in. In areas where you wish you find meaning and significance.
3) It provides better insight into problems
While it may come off as rumination, pondering on a flaw longer than you’d like has its benefits. Through being conscientious and meticulous, imposters often achieve an in-depth level of prose in their work. This is because entertaining your doubts prompts you to seek more training and information.
Additionally, with imposter syndrome, you always feel like a beginner. Refraining from being an expert means you’re always a learner. This beginner’s mindset also helps you question traditional ways of working, potentially giving you fresh perspectives.
“In the beginner’s mind, there are many possibilities. In the expert’s mind, there are a few.”
Shunryu Suzuki, Sōtō Zen monk and teacher who helped popularize Zen Buddhism in the United States
4) It teaches humble confidence
Surfing the imposter waves, I’ve always been aware of how irrational feelings of incompetence destroy me. However, I’ve also been cautious about the detrimental consequences of overconfidence. Eventually, my imposter syndrome taught me the power of humble confidence.
Humble confidence means trusting your abilities while practicing enough humility to be open to better solutions. It presents a good amount of confidence to go beyond your comfort zone while retaining enough doubt to welcome criticism. Sometimes, confidence rises faster than competence, while unworthiness rises faster than failure. This makes humble confidence a corrective lens that allows us to recognize our weaknesses yet preserve respect for our efforts.
“Not knowing something doesn’t make you a fraud, it makes you a student.”
Marie Forleo, author of New York Times bestselling book ‘Everything is Figureoutable’
Concluding thoughts…
Confronting heads on with my imposter syndrome helped me realize that it isn’t as monstrous as I thought. And that my fears needed my attention rather than my abandonment. At the end of the day, the goal is not to never feel like an imposter but to hear it out and allow it to voice its truths.
