Imagine being an “emotional sponge”, constantly absorbing the feelings and energy of those around you. From people near you to those you see through a digital screen, you naturally (and sometimes unwillingly) soak up a vast spectrum of emotions. Because of this, you’re easily overwhelmed and drained out. If you could relate to this scenario, you may be an empath, like me!
What are empaths?
Psychologists coined the term ‘empath’ to describe those with a high level of empathy. Empaths are emotionally receptive individuals, harnessing the innate ability to sense others’ thoughts and feelings. Although empaths have many positive qualities, such as being excellent confidants, they may also absorb the angst and agony of others to their own detriment.
The neurochemistry of an empath
The human brain’s mirror neuron system is a specialized group of cells that facilitates social interaction. Mirror neurons are responsible for human compassion, reflecting others’ behavior on both an emotional and physical level. While everyone has mirror neurons, they are hyperactive among empaths. As a result, empaths easily reflect and absorb others’ feelings and physical sensations regardless of pain or joy.
In a study at McGill University in Montreal, researchers exposed participants to a heat stimulus after watching someone else experience the same uncomfortable stimulus. They found that people with the highest empathy scores experienced greater physical sensations of pain compare to those in the low empathy group.
Why being an empath can be stressful?
1. Empaths get anxious over other’s feelings
When our loved ones are upset or stressed, empaths feel get distressed right along with them. An empath doesn’t just feel for someone — they feel with someone. With this deep emotional intuition, they can even pick up on things other people miss or make connections that aren’t salient, and maybe don’t even make sense, to others.
2. Empaths drain out easily
Being hyper receptive to sensory and emotional energy can put an empath in a constant state of exhaustion. Even more so when the energy is negative or assaultive. If empaths aren’t mindful of their emotional boundaries, this constant exhaustion can manifest in a plethora of physical symptoms.
Empathic superpowers
1. Empaths are highly intuitive
Empaths are extremely in tune with their gut feelings. This intuition allows them to easily detect whether a person is being truthful and genuine. If this superpower is put into good use, empaths can screen out people not worthy of their time, or step away from situations that do more harm than good.
2. Empaths are great listeners and confidants
Nurturing good connections and relationships come naturally to empaths. This is because they tend to have welcoming vibes that make people feel understood and safe. Empaths are also fantastic listeners as they listen beyond your words, picking up subtle cues that allow them to provide good insight.
Finding balance as an empath
1. Emotional decompression
While empaths wish to save everyone and everything, it is crucial for them to prioritize quiet time to emotionally decompress. Take mini-breaks throughout the day, go for a walk in nature, meditate and breathe. These interludes give those hyper receptive senses the break they deserve – ultimately preventing emotional burnout.
2. Set an “emotional quota”
When the emotions of others have such an intense impact on empaths, setting boundaries, or an “emotional quota” becomes even more essential. As an empath, try gauging the amount of time you feel comfortable being in a socially stimulating situation, and try sticking to that. If someone begins to ask too much of you, you’re allowed to say “no”. And it’s not necessary to explain why. This helps you be more mindful of how much energy you give away to others because you obviously need some for yourself too!
Concluding thoughts…
To all my fellow empaths, while we take pride in being the superhero of compassion, know that even Batman and Wonder Woman need breaks! Only by understanding ourselves and our limits, we can better use our emotional intelligence to be there for others, without the heavy obligation of shouldering all of civilization’s discontents.
