in.sight
a newsletter for the eyes of the mind
SERIES 02 | ISSUE 09
Goodbye self-help. Hello self-realization.
The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.
– Pablo Picasso
Humans are wired to learn, evolve, and seek success. That’s why self-help is such a thriving industry. We see this especially in our current information renaissance on the Internet.
Self-help literature and influencers on every social media platform tell us to optimize every second, maintain self-discipline, and construct a life that resembles a collection of perfect moments. Hence, what once started as an innocent pursuit of self-improvement, can very quickly become a very exhaustive to-do list.
An ode to self-optimization fatigue
As someone who’s been working in this space for a while, I know what it’s like to still feel that imposter-ish tickle of inadequacy despite bathing in algorithms of self-improvement. (Yes, I’m saying this as a writer in the self-help space)
Chasing passing trends in health, fashion, and productivity, our lives can indeed feel like a continuous rush to achieve more, excel, and speed up.
You’re not alone. Growth is great, but you don’t have to be a constant self-improvement project. On your journey of healing, improving, growing, you deserve to breathe and live a little too.
What do you actually find at the end of self-help?
So you’ve read, watched, listened to every book, video, podcast out there. You’ve optimized every area of your life to the best of your ability. And then what?
After a while, you realize most advice out there starts to sound the same, but packaged in a different voice or book cover. Or maybe your inability to conform to the current standard of a “productive, successful, and happy human being” makes you feel like you like you’ve got some kind of psychological flaw.
It’s so important to remember that most of the stuff on self-help out there is prescriptive to the general population. And even when one manages to achieve what they want by following steps A-Z, fulfilment is not a guarantee.
Ultimately, when you’ve reached the “end” of it all, what you achieve is a lot of self-realization.
It’s realizing what works for you, and what doesn’t.
It’s realizing that maybe becoming a millionaire or a fitness guru isn’t what you need to be happy.
It’s realizing that there’s more to life than optimizing your morning routine.
💝 noteworthy
Trauma is ubiquitous. Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, trauma specialist , spent 30+ years aiding survivors of war, abuse, and poverty. In ‘The Body Keeps the Score,’ he reveals how trauma reshapes body and brain, diminishing pleasure, control, and trust. He highlights novel therapies like, EMDR, neurofeedback, meditation, and yoga, leveraging neuroplasticity. Grounded in both client-centered research and experience, the book beautifully and compellingly unveils our potent ability to harm and heal—providing hope for recovery.
😌 calm corner
Video: Life is short (how to spend it wisely) | Pick Up Limes
A collection of Taylor Swift’s mellower tunes that will make you want to move to a seaside cottage, drink tea, and read a good book on a rainy summer’s day.